Time Spent

There are times when I do something that doesn't yield results, or produce practical benefits. Sometimes, I want to vegetate and have fun. So, below is a list of my favorite entertainments. You will see the evolution of good sitcoms or favorite movies, not arranged by strict decade, but by rough time periods.

Want to disagree? Can't stand my choices? Want to add your own? Well, get your own blog.

Early 60s or so: The Dick Van Dyke Show
Late 60s, Early 70s or so: Gilligan's Island.
Late 70s: Happy Days. WKRP in Cincinnati.
Early 80s: Charles in Charge.
Late 80s, Early 90s: My Two Dads.
Late 90s: Boy Meets World. Everybody Loves Raymond.
Early 10s (or whatever we're calling that decade): Reba.
Current: Big Time Rush. Victorious. (Hey, like I said. If you disagree, get your own blog). And, as an honorable mention for a show that isn't a sitcom, but makes me laugh, Wipeout.

Of course, if I included British Sitcoms, there would be no competition, so I didn't include them. So, before going on, a special mention for: Good Neighbors. Are You Being Served. Keeping Up Appearances. Fawlty Towers. Waiting for God. Red Dwarf.

And the best movies, roughly in chronological order:

The Russians are Coming. Father Goose. Who's Minding the Mint. the Three Musketeers (and sequel). Charade. Planet of the Apes. Logan's Run. What's Up Doc. Star Wars (the original trilogy).

Raiders of the Lost Ark (and following films). Jurassic Park (yes, even part 2 and 3). Die Hard. Terminator (et al). The Name of the Rose. Aliens. Far Off Place. Crimson Tide. Much Ado About Nothing. Clue. The Gods Must Be Crazy (and sequel). Men in Black. The Fifth Element. The Mummy and the Mummy Returns (sorry, can't include the third one).

Galaxy Quest. While You Were Sleeping. Pride and Prejudice (A&E). Independence Day. Jumanji. Down Periscope. Hoodwinked. X-Men (and sequels, of course). Pirates of the Caribbean (um, okay, maybe the sequels. Maybe not). Transformers.

I know. There were others that were good. I can hear you from here. "Hey Man, What about Treasure Planet?" "Dude, What about Back to the Future?" Okay, fine. I agree, but I couldn't include every movie I ever liked. "What about epics movies, like The Lord of the Ring?" Sorry. I know someone will get mad at me, but I had to force myself to sit all the way through the first one, and couldn't force myself to sit through the others.

"Dude, man, Ishtar." Um. No. And you can go home.

Okay, like I said. This was a fun exercise. An evening of mindless entertainment. And probably tomorrow, my list would have been different. But don't worry. I'll try and make my next blog more earth shattering and heart wrenching.

Vacation 2010

Well, one more vacation is done.

First, a quick recap: Ahem, in no particular order... Wind storm, yellow jackets, fishing, hiking, torrents of water, vomiting, great horned owl, wild dogs.

Okay, so, now the long version.

I was prepared this time around. I had loaded up the truck two days ahead of time. Gas was full. Snacks were easily accessible. A children's audiobook in the CD player ready to go.

We left early, ready for a good time to be had by all. Well, so much for plans. My son started throwing up at the campsite and spent the first day laying in the tent, wiped out. So, instead of the first day's activities, we mostly hung out at camp, with just a couple of short hikes with my daughter and me.

The second day was a bit better. My son was back to his regular energetic self. We started the day with a great breakfast. Now, those who camped with me in my hiking days will remember the dismal breakfasts we would have when we had to carry it all on our backs. These days, my wife has introduced me to car-camping. This still involves tents, but the tents are larger. And the stove it a massive two burner. There's a portable sink and chairs and a full size table. And Breakfast.

Scrambled eggs, bacon, toast and coffee. Let me tell you, a far cry from the instant eggs and oatmeal of my hiking days. After breakfast, we headed out for lake fishing. The kids were pumped and ready for fishing. Unfortunately, the previous experience, where they each caught a fish within the first half hour has left them with unrealistic expectations. After 45 minutes, they were done. No fish.

Oh. But there was excitement. Apparently, yellow jackets like to build nests near the edge of the lake. And, apparently, they don't like dads like me who stomp next to their nests in hiking boots. The dang things don't even have the decency to die after stinging you, like any proper bee would. Nope. They can go right on doing so.

So, fishing finished for a time, we headed out on the day's adventures. We drove to dry falls, for the kids to see the amazing scenery. And, I'm sorry, I really, really like the bold-voiced documentaries that parks and interpretive centers show in the little make-shift theaters. The kids and I enjoyed watching them (my wife is less impressed by them. She doesn't see watching a screen as part of a vacation).

After some site-seeing around dry falls, we drove out to the Lenora Lakes Caves. These are prehistoric caves that are fairly easily accessible, for the most part. These caves were wintering sites for prehistoric native americans. We grabbed extra water (it was over 90 degrees and we have been used to temps in the 60s) and our hiking sticks and tromped off. The dog always starts off with enthusiasm. "Oh, good, we're going for a walk." But ends up with staring at us, as if to say, "Who's stupid idea was this?"

If you ever get to do this hike, let me give you a little hint. Don't stop with the first cave. It's a disappointment. Don't' stop with the 2nd, although it was pretty cool. Don't even stop with the 3rd or 4th. If you keep going, you can see the big caves around the bend. But don't stop there. After the 7th, you realize the preceding caves are just cave-wanna-be's. If you keep going over the ridge, and into the gully on this side of the coulee, you will see a real site.

Oh, a note of caution. If you go this far, you will have to pass over the narrow walkway which is wide enough for people hugging the wall, but the dog won't fit. Be sure, if you bring a dog, to bring someone along who doesn't mind waiting with the dog at the 6th cave while the rest of you goes on. Oh, and while you are going across the narrow walkway, watching your feet to make sure you don't slip, don't forget to watch your head as well. There's a low-hanging outcrop of rocks that really hurts if you whack your head against it. Just ask my son.

Once over that last ridge, you find a cave large enough for an entire village, down inside a gully. It is really something worth hiking for. I want to go back and try the other hike in the area, up over the main coulee into a smaller, parallel coulee, where you can find boulders with ancient pictographs. But it has to be done in the spring or fall. In the summer, you would need more water than you could easily carry.

That night, we headed up to the Grand Coulee Dam to watch the laser-light show. It's the exact same recording Mikee and I saw back 18 years ago (dang, was it really that long ago?). "I am strength. I am power. I am the river Columbia." The kids said it was awesome. Since the water level is high this time of year, the overflow roared majestically all the time. I'm glad they got to see it.

The drive back to the campsite was something. The lightshow has to wait until the sun goes down, so the show ends just before 10:40 at night. We stayed all the way until closing (11:00) to avoid the crowd of cars trying to leave at the same time, and to make sure the kids used the rest room. (There are no reststops on the way back to the campsite). It is a dark, lonely drive back. No lights. Seldom any other cars. Just you, stuck in a tiny world illuminated by your headlights.

At one point, we saw a huge rock in the road. I slowed and the rock sprouted huge, magnificent wings. I have never seen a owl that big before. He took off completely silently. My wife alerted me to its presence by shouting out useful phrases like, "Oh, Um, That, Um, Look."

She was much more articulate when the deer ran in front of me and stopped to watch me approach. She was still yelling "Deer" after I was stopped and the deer was walking off. The pack of dogs along the side of the road was another interesting site. Either they were standing around a packmate who had been hit, or they were feeding on a dead deer. Either way, we didn't stick around. The bat that swooped down and confusedly fluttered around the windshield added to the excitement.

Unfortunately, the drive back as also punctuated by my daughter, having a turn at whatever bug my son had suffered, repeatedly vomiting in the back seat. Like any experienced parents, we travel with vomit bags tucked into both kid's seats, and a plastic bag to dispose of them in.

Both kids slept deeply that night. After a day of exercises, fresh air and late night, sleep came easily to them. Unfortunately, a wind storm hit, trying to take down the tent, and, after the first branch hit our tent, my wife and I did not sleep well. I brought an audiobook on my MP3 player, so I lay there, listening to the adventures of Shea and Flick as they tried to find the Sword of Shannara.

The next morning, dead tired, we took the kids fishing again. Although everyone seemed to be feeling better, but my daughter did end up losing her breakfast in the bushes. No fish were caught, but I wasn't attacked by yellow jackets, so I liked the 2nd day of fishing much better than the first.

On our way back home, we stopped for a tour of the Grand Coulee Dam, and a hike through the Ginkgo Petrified Forest. That was fun. We listed to more of the Wayside School stories during the long drive. As the sun was setting, we headed into the pass, on our way home. That was when my wife succumbed to the virus the kids had gone through, and she really wanted to get home before it got really bad.

And then we stopped, near the summit, for an hour, while the road crews did blasting. Listening to the Wayside kids and the sounds of my wife trying not to throw up. But, let me tell you, bringing these audiobooks along really helped keep the kids happy while we sat there. And the Wayside School stories are witty enough for adults to listen to as well. (Find it here). (We borrowed our copy from our local library).

We finally arrived late at night, my wife sicker than a dog. The kids and I unloaded the most needed stuff from the car, while she sprinted across the yard. Now two days later, my wife is still sick (apparently, kids recover faster than adults), and, after putting away much of the camping gear, I'm selfishly hoping I don't catch whatever it is everyone has had. It doesn't look good at work to call in sick your first day back from vacation. But, it would be a fitting ending to this vacation.

Boastful - or - What a Full Day

I'm going to indulge myself and be boastful today. That was one really long day. We got up early, and I walked the kids down to the school. We spent the morning with the cub scouts, walking all over the neighborhood putting flyers on doors announcing our intention to have a food drive (we'll walk around picking up the food next week). Now, I think that alone should have been enough. Surely I could have come home and relaxed.

But, no, I don't seem destined for relaxation. After the morning of walking with multiple kids (each kid expands the energy draining affect by 2. In affect, the energy leaves you body exponentially by a factor of how many kids you have with you. The amount of adults you have along does nothing to aleave this. Kids are draining, and that's all there is to it). Let's see, where was I, before my tirade? Oh, right...

After the morning of walking with multiple kids all over the neighborhood, I took my kids plus one neighbor kid to the library, for the Tech-Fair. We attended storytimes, talked with librarians, learned about databases and had a good time. Tiring time as well. Any event that involves kids is tiring, no matter how interesting. Still, the two boys earned credits toward a cub scout badge.

Done yet? No, of course not. It was only 1:00 by then. I took the kids and my wife to McDonalds and then back to my house, where the kids had a play date. (For the uninitiated, a play date consists of kids playing, arguing, having fun, arguing, making a mess and, of course, arguing. Yet, despite all the arguing, they confess to having a great time and hate to see it end. Once again, this is a massive draw on my energy (because, of course, it's all about me).

So once the play date is over, can I finally relax? Are you kidding? Now it's time to get my weekend chores started. Plumbing comes first. This is always true because you have to get the plumbing done before the hardware store closes. It is always a mistake to be working on plumbing when every place that sells parts is closed. You can work on a car and leave it until tomorrow. You can rewire a lamp and leave it until next week. But you have to have plumbing.
So, once I had reassembled the sink, you would think I would be done, eh? HA! I'll say it again... HA!

Don't get me wrong. The sink is fixed (except that I noticed some parts starting to fail, so I need to remember to buy them this week so I can fix that problem next weekend before it becomes a real problem. A house is never really finished, is it?). Where was I, again? Dang, I tend to wander, don't I?

Okay, so I walked the kids around the neighborhood, took them to a program, let them have a play date and then did some plumbing. What was next? Well, it was dinner time, so I had to cook. I admit, food is my downfall, my obsession. That's not to say that I enjoy cooking. I hate cooking. I really enjoy eating. So I cook so that I can eat. This time I decided to have a breakfast for dinner. Homemade waffles, bacon and eggs. Oooooo, life is good.

Done? Please, don't make me laugh. Tonight is daylight savings time and I don't dare leave it for tomorrow. I hate waking up, having a leisurely breakfast and suddenly finding out I'm later than I thought I was. So I went around the house systematically changing every clock in the house. (This did have the added benefit of making the kids think it was later than it really was. That on top of all the fresh air they got today helped them fall asleep earlier than normal). Then, of course, you have to change all the batteries in the smoke detectors and Carbon Monoxide detector.

Finally done? No?

Almost. The kids had homework and Awana homework to do. Then there's the nightly reading (which has evolved. I don't just read to them each night now. I read one book, they each read one book, and then I read a chapter from a chapter book). This is followed by chasing kids around the house (which is really conducive to helping a kid fall asleep) getting them to brush their teeth, clean up toys and get ready for bed.

Then, I get to rest. HA! Fooled you. One more task to do.

This is midterms week. I needed to write up my final draft for my mid-term essay exam. Eight stinking pages that make up a quarter of my grade. But, by 11:00, that is finally finished and proof read and then uploaded to the instructor.

Done.

What a day. Then I decided to write about it. Guess I hope to remember it, some day in the future, when I'm retired and board. Then again, I'll probably be walking my grandkids around the neighborhood delivering flyers. And doing plumbing. Sigh.

But I'm done for now.

Finally rest.


I just need to take the dog outside for her last potty-break, feed the cat, get ready for bed and get everything ready for church tomorrow.
Um, rest?

Growing Up

Last night, my son carved his own pumpkin. Guess old dad is on his way out, as being useful. When I get home, he no longer runs into the room yelling "Daddy". He walks through the room, real slow, points a finger and says, "Hey Dad" real low and slow. He's growing up.

It won't be long and he'll be independent. Driving. Working. Knowing everything.

But, eventually, he'll get his own house and then he'll have questions again. And I will suddenly become knowledgable again.

Guess I better start studying.

Disneyland

What a trip.

Oops, I mean,
"What a vacation".
Disneyland was great. But, boy am I tired.

Day 1.

We took the kids on a plane for the first time. Just getting them through security and the airport was an adventure in itself. And then on the plane. When it roared and we were pushed back in the our seats, and we felt the sudden lift, the kids looked at me with a mixture of excitement and fear.



I sat with the kids on the way to Disneyland, and my wife sat with them on the way back. But we were smart. We brought sticker books and a DVD player. They stayed happily entertained the entire way. But my daughter wailed as we landed. The cold in her sinuses made the pressure changes unbearable, but she wouldn't believe me that chewing gum would help. I mean, really, what does dad know?


The driver that took us to Disneyland was a maniac. I'm pretty sure I met his brother, a cab driver in London (I have two cousins who will know what I'm talking about). And I really didn't want to die. Not on the way to Disneyland. After would have been fine, but not before.


We finally reached Disneyland at about 5:00. As is traditional, we rode the train around the park first, to give the kids an orientation of the park. Then we entered. In just that first evening, we rode Bus Lightyear's Astro-blasters (excellent), Snow White's Scary Adventure (actually startled me), Big Thunder Mountain Railroad (one of my favorites), Pirates of the Caribbean (my favorite) and I can't remember what else. We slept really well that night.







The next days were amazing.



After a hearty breakfast (never get one of those wimpy continental breakfasts. Stay at a hotel with sausage, hash brown, eggs and biscuits and gravy) each morning, we entered the park early. I really like mornings in Disneyland. (And afternoons). Oh, um, and nights. I really like nights at Disneyland too. But mornings are nice too. (Have I made the point yet)? The bright morning light, the smaller crowd, the fresh clean feel and the cooler weather. Nobody's tired or grumpy yet. (Maybe Dopey or Sleepy, but not Grumpy). Everyone is smiling and dancing. Kids are happy (trust me, even at Disneyland, kids get tired and grumpily. Um. So do parents).



As the day went on, we would rush from ride to ride. After the second day, I got smart and brought the gameboy so the kids could play it while waiting in line. I even surprised them with two new Disney games (well, okay, two used Disney games, but new to them). We went from land to land. Adventureland (where the characters dress like me), Fantasyland (filled with characters that don't dress like me), Tomorrowland (filled with characters dressed as Jedi, how I wish I dressed), New Orleans Square with the music and the pirates, Frontierland (with characters that, yes, do dress like me), Toon town (with, well, places the kids liked) and Main street, a magical place.



California Adventure wasn't quite as much fun. The rides were still fun, but somehow the magic was missing. In Disneyland, even the walk between rides can be magical. In California Adventure, it's nothing really special. Most of it, anyway. Some of the rides are really incredible, though. Grizzly Rapids are amazing, if you don't mind getting soaked. Soaring over California was worth it, and Tower of Terror was so much fun, I laughed out loud. (Outbursts of happiness is not my normal mode). Monsters Inc was cute and the kids really liked it. And who can resist talking to Crush? (Both of my kids were called on by him). But my favorite was the Toy Story Ride. Not the Astro-blasters, but the 3-D shooting game. Guess I'm just competitive by nature. Gotta get that high score. Some rides were boring. But I went on every little kid ride, because my daughter was too short to go on alone. The boring rides. The rides that made me sick. Even the long-line boring rides. Sometimes you just gotta be a dad and do it.



One place C.A. does better than Disneyland is food. At least there is one area with a variety of food, some for kids and some for adults, near each other. Disney's foods are spread out around the park. If kids want hot dogs and parents want hamburgers, you're looking at a walk half way around the park to get each.



Ah, night is magical. The lights, the crowd, the music. Night is almost as much fun as morning. And many of the rides are more open. What is more fun then complete exhaustion, walking slowly (because you can't walk fast) and taking in the sights and sounds? Even the dark rides seemed darker, mistier. More dusk like. And walking Main street, with the lights, the entertainers, the window displays.



And the last night. Sad, but still happy. Looking at each sight for the last time. Greedily soaking in every image, every sound. And looking at the glowing castle, one last time. Melancholy. Walking slowly. Resisting leaving, even while so tired, long past midnight, carrying a sleeping child. You can't stay. But you sure want to. Like the end of an incredible meal. Too full to eat any more, fully satisfied. Remembering the flavours. Not ready to be done.



And then you pass through the exit. Into the night, the late-night crowds moving along with you, just as you have done each of the five nights. But tonight is different. You aren't going back the other way the next morning. You won't be walking this wonderful road again.



Maybe we won't wait 10 years next time. Maybe five.



Maybe I would rather move in.



Happiest place on earth.